EMBRACING CHANGE… as if you chose it

EMBRACING CHANGE… as if you chose it

What a crazy notion: embracing change as if you chose it.

Unless your circumstances are dire – or you’ve just won the lottery – change is the last thing you want, right? When everything and everyone in your life remains the same or at least similar to what you’ve come to expect, there are no nasty surprises, no disappointments.

But nothing and no one on earth remains constant.

Change is all around us: seasons, jobs, circumstances, health, moods… Everything changes!

So why not embrace change. Just try it. It’s a mindset – an attitude that says I’m going to try my darndest to make the absolute best of every circumstance.

Our last 3 Christmases have been very different from all the previous ones.

Something unthinkable (to me, anyway) happened at the end of 2020; something that caused a deep sorrow that still lingers. And that something caused a major change in my life.

The change was completely out of my control. I tried everything I could think of to reverse matters, but nothing worked. This ‘something’ is still here, clinging to me like slimy black seaweed.

So for the last two years I’ve had to work on embracing this circumstance: on searching for, and finding, the positives – even in a seemingly hopeless situation. And you know what? It helps me get through the day.

Not only that, this attitude has opened my eyes to possibilities and opportunities I never ever would have considered or imagined!

Now, listen. I am a hopeaholic by nature. A cockeyed optimist, sure. Absolutely. Always will be. No matter what happens to me, I am keenly aware that there are countless others who have it much, much worse. It’s all about perspective. Right?

No matter how bad things are in my life, even in the midst of the most awful sadness and grief, I have always had a deep, indescribable, unending joy. And hope. And peace. I absolutely believe things will turn out for the best. Even when I can’t fathom how that will come about.

But for a lot of people (creatives especially) negativity, depression and, oftentimes, hopelessness, are the norm; and seeing things from a different perspective seems impossible.

That’s why I’m encouraging – nay, urging – you to embrace your circumstances! Whatever they are! You might be surprised at what you’ll discover.

For example, look at all the Creatives who embraced their new circumstances and came into their own during the pandemic! They were either made redundant, or they realised life is short and so they quit the 9-to-5. But because they still had to make a living, and forced to remain at home, they made the decision to do something they loved. They worked their passion, started earning money from it, and were fulfilled.

Now I know there are those whose circumstances are a lot different; for whom grief is a daily part of life at the moment. I’m not trying to diminish your feelings in any way. I’m just trying to say: this is a season you need to go through, and it’s OK to feel. Don’t try and suppress these deep-seated feelings. Just know: it’s temporary. You will make it through. Just hold on a little longer. Take things moment by moment…

I’m obviously no psychologist; I’m just sharing with you how I’m coping, and thriving. And I hope it helps you in some way.

It’s so easy for us to be self-focused, self-centred. But if we realise that no matter what we’re going through, there are always others, many others, who are having to endure much worse circumstances, and maybe there’s some way we can help them – well, that could be the reason you’re alive.

This ‘situation’ I’m in: at times it feels unbearable. Grief threatens to overwhelm me. But I know: ‘this too shall pass’. And I have a choice. We always have a choice. Do or die. Sink or float. Or swim! Drown in depression or sing through the pain. Wallow in sadness or decide to be grateful for every single thing, every single person, in your life, past and present. It’s your choice.

Gratitude is my attitude. And hope is my Kung Fu.

I choose to believe there’s a reason I’m going through whatever it is – so I can come alongside someone who’s going through a similar circumstance, and let them know they’re not alone. Let them know: there’s always hope.

I hope I’ve made a difference today, at least in one person’s life. Thank you for joining me. I hope you’re inspired and motivated!

If you liked this post, please share it far and wide.

If you have any comments, or a short, inspirational story to share, pop these in the COMMENTS box below.

If it’s a long story, I’d love to hear it too. Get in touch with me – pop over to my Contact page – and send me an email.

Until next time, take care of yourself, be kind to each other, and consider embracing change!

With Love,

Vx

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MAKING A DIFFERENCE, IMPACTING YOUNG LIVES

MAKING A DIFFERENCE, IMPACTING YOUNG LIVES

Does your child/nephew/niece/grandchild think they’re special, amazing, unique?

Do they truly know their worth?

Wherein does their IDENTITY lie?

Meet Lynette Snyman. This South African has made it her mission to positively impact the lives of as many children as possible. And testimonies like this one are irrefutable proof that she’s accomplishing her goal:

One children’s pastor from a church using the syllabus Lynette created forwarded a voice note from a parent about how a lesson had impacted her family. The lesson was about how God has made each of us in an amazing and wonderful way, and that He has great plans for our life. Each child was given a mirror and they had to decorate it with stickers, and write I AM AMAZING on the bottom. This pastor gave each child a mirror to give away to someone else.

The voice note from the mom said: ‘My younger daughter gave the mirror to her friend during school. She told me that at aftercare her friend kept taking the mirror out of her bag and saying over and over: “I am amazing.” She said she could see the excitement in her eyes.’ The mom went on to say: ‘This material that you have sourced carries so much power and it’s so amazing to see the children doing what they have learnt at children’s church.’ 

Want to know more? Read on…

Corporate look

Lynette, what did you want to be when you grew up?

I always wanted to be a Year 1-3 teacher.

Did you realise that dream?

Yes. However, after teaching for six years, I became restless. So I prayed and asked God what to do. I was at a real crossroads. I asked Him to send someone to offer me a job in the next ten days. A few days later my pastor asked me to come and ‘sort out the children’s ministry’. I nearly fainted!

I love how God answered your specific prayer! And you’ve been in children’s ministry ever since. Tell us about your work.

I’ve been fortunate enough to have been teaching children for more than 20 years about Father God who loves them. At my church, where I’m a children’s pastor, we provide a place for 3- to 13-year-olds to encounter Jesus and experience His love and presence.

Part of my role as a children’s pastor is to source appropriate material to use in our children’s church. Because we live in South Africa, buying anything from the UK or USA is very expensive; and often, especially with the USA material, it has to be rewritten because our culture is very different. A few years ago I decided to write my own syllabus — without the help of Google. I wanted to make sure that it was all my own work, because I knew that I had to make it as a resource for not only my church but other churches too, across the world.

Ally grins

What was your LIGHTBULB moment?

Over the last 15 years I have had several prophetic words about writing material. So I knew it was in the pipeline. There are so many great, free children’s ministry resources available, but most of them teach children about God. Very few enable and encourage children to have a relationship with God.

I was looking for material that taught children about how God speaks to us, and then made listening to Him part of the lesson. I also wanted something that would work in a South African context, with a South African budget, and internationally. I remembered all the prophetic words and, encouraged and supported by my husband and son, decided to write my own.

Fit and fab

How did you know this was your calling, part of your purpose?

Besides all the prophetic words that I’d had over the years about writing, it is something that I enjoy, and it comes relatively easily to me.

How did you make the time in your busy schedule to create and write your unique, inspired syllabus?

The best thing I did was set aside one morning a week for writing. I would sit down after spending time with God and tackle whatever lessons I had to write for that day. I wasn’t allowed to pack up for the day until I had written my allotted number of lessons. When I got stuck, I prayed. And Holy Spirit always gave me ideas of what to write.

How do you promote your syllabus?

On my Living Clay website, which my very talented son built for me. I also promote it at conferences and workshops that a friend and I host. And some people hear about it from others and contact me.

Currently, my syllabus is being used by churches in South Africa, Canada, New Zealand and the USA.

 

Zumbalicious
Zumbalicious

Any journey highlights you’d like to share?

It’s been very humbling to get personal messages and photos from churches who are using my material, saying what a huge impact it is having on their children’s church. To think that something that I have written, with huge help from Holy Spirit, is having an impact not only in our church, but in several other churches, is very surreal.

One of the reviews on my website — a pastor’s recommendation — mentions that ‘kids with attention difficulties have engaged beautifully in this too‘.

Another children’s pastor told me about how initially the children struggled to write in their journals during ‘God Time’ (sitting quietly in God’s presence, listening to Him). One of the children didn’t want to participate at all, so she sat beside him and asked him how he was feeling and whether she could pray with him. After that, he wrote practically an entire page in his journal.

I was at a church recently where I was introduced as the lady who wrote all their lessons, and the children clapped for me. It was very sweet. I explained to the children that I didn’t write it alone — Holy Spirit helped me. I prayed before I planned each lesson set, and before I wrote each lesson. Whenever I got stuck I would say: ‘Holy Spirit, we need an idea here’, and soon enough an idea would pop into my head.

Were there particular moments when you had to take huge steps of faith?

Around the time I started writing the syllabus, another children’s pastor started inviting me to speak at workshops and conferences with her. That really was a huge step of faith for me. Now we plan and run the workshops and conferences together. Working with her has taught me how to jump out of the boat and walk on the water… and keep focussing on Jesus!

My current huge step of faith is trusting God to give me more opportunities to mentor and train others in the area of Children’s ministry. I feel that I have a wealth of experience and I would like to walk alongside and help others who are starting out or feeling a little stuck or overwhelmed. It is a difficult ministry to be in, as often you have to give up attending church with the rest of your family to do it. It can feel very lonely and isolating.

Zumbalicious

Steepest learning curve?

Let’s just say that there were some very stressful moments when my husband was trying to teach me new computer skills . . . However, my computer skills dramatically increased, so I’m grateful!

My current learning curve is how to market and sell my material. I have no business training, so I am having to figure things out as I go. It’s been really difficult ‘putting myself out there’ and promoting my syllabus. Charging people for my work doesn’t come naturally to me, although I understand that people put more value to something that they have paid for, and to create a good product costs money, because you need to pay for editing and illustrations, etcetera.

Any pearls of wisdom you’d like to share for those who aspire to make a difference or feel called to ministry?

Chat to people who are already doing what you’d like to do. Ask for help or direction when you need it. Pray and spend time with God to get His direction. Do whatever God gives you to do, even if it isn’t exactly what you had in mind to do. You never know what one thing will lead to.

Also, don’t try to be someone else. God has made you you, with your specific gifting and skill set, and even your wacky personality and traits. Work with what you’ve got, not what you wish you had.

As well as being a children’s pastor, syllabus creator/writer, wife, mother, conference and workshop speaker (do you sleep??) — I understand you volunteer with another pretty special ministry?

For the last ten years I have been fortunate enough to be part of a non-profit organisation called I am Special. It is staffed by volunteers who go into schools and tell children that Jesus loves them, and that God has a plan for their lives. We each have a specific school that we visit. Every Monday morning I spend 30 minutes in each of the six Grade 3 classes, and teach them about Jesus.

Many of the children at the school are from disadvantaged backgrounds. It’s always so rewarding when the children are excited to see me and greet me with huge enthusiasm. I say: ‘Good morning, children’, and they reply with: ‘Good morning, I am Special’. The great thing about the name of the programme is that they are speaking the fact that they are special over themselves every time they say the name.

Ally and students

Moments that have ‘made your day’?

I got a voice note from a mom whose children come to our children’s church. She wanted to know which songs we did at church the previous Sunday, because her three-year-old son keeps singing this one song, and she doesn’t recognise it. After several messages back and forth, we finally found the right one. It’s good to know that what we do on a Sunday doesn’t stay at church, but goes home with the children.

One of my highlights is spending time with my ‘children’ when they are all grown up. Many of the children I ministered to when I first started are adults now, and some have started families of their own. I’m still ‘Aunty Lynette’ to them, and I feel honoured that they still want to connect with me.

Lynette, you are a dollop of pure sunshine and I’m honoured to know you and call you my good friend. May God continue to bless you mightily in this powerful work you do.

For anyone interested in Lynette’s amazing syllabus for children’s church, there’s a 3 for 2 SPECIAL on her Living Clay website — only until the end of November!

Tweetable TAKEAWAYS:

Work with what you’ve got, not what you wish you had.

Pursue your passion, follow your heart.

You are unique, special, amazing!

 

Just so you know…

I don’t receive any reward or commission for promoting any of the people or businesses on my blog. I just want to inspire & motivate as many people as possible to fulfil their purpose & potential.

 If any other key points stood out for you, or you just want to let me know what you thought about this interview, feel free to comment below.

NEXT TIME on The Hopeaholic blog. . .

More inspiration, motivation & hope.

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WIND BENEATH MY WINGS: it’s never too late to follow your dream.

WIND BENEATH MY WINGS: it’s never too late to follow your dream.

MARK PILE, a consultant, has a Foundation Arts Degree in Security & Risk Management, and a background in counter-intelligence. His talents and hobbies include singing, playing guitar, dancing and acting. He’s been told he has a natural golf swing; and he enjoys photography and loves sailing and travelling. But he chose aviation as his dream.

A dream he only actively began to pursue a few months ago, at the age of 53.

Corporate look

Mark, how long have you been waiting for this dream to happen?

I’ve been waiting since my 30s. When I was in the South African Navy, I had the opportunity to do some flying with the air force pilots in a helicopter and I got to sit in the co-pilot’s seat. I knew then: this is what I want to do.

You were conscripted – you had to join the armed forces – and you initially chose the air force, right?

Yes, I was nineteen. Even back then I wanted to be in the air: I wanted to fly jets. But I was short-sighted and they only took people with twenty-twenty vision. So I chose the navy.

When you were growing up, what did you want to be?

At one stage I wanted to be a lawyer. Mercantile law. Because it had to do with the sea, and sailing. I’ve always loved sailing.

Why did your dream of being a lawyer end?

My parents couldn’t afford to send me to university.

So, now that you’ve got the money to pursue your passion, why aren’t you pursuing a law career?

Because it’s not my passion. It was of great interest to me in my teens, but the moment I realised it wasn’t achievable, I put it aside, and I’ve not regretted it. A huge part of it comes from knowing your purpose, and I’ve always felt I’m called to do something other than a corporate job. I’ve never wanted a day-to-day ‘office’ job – something that’s the same every single day. With flying, I get to go up into the clouds, 3,000 feet, and that’s my office.

As this dream of yours is still in progress – you’re currently training for your private pilot licence (PPL) – what do you currently do for a job?

I’m a consultant, working for a large construction/engineering/facilities management company, Vinci Facilities, on a Ministry of Defence contract. That’s all I can say about that.

Ah. Or you’ll have to kill me.

Yes. (Haha.)

When do you pursue your passion for flying?

On weekends and the occasional off day during the week. I have an amazing instructor – Iona Morris – and I’m just so blessed by her. I won’t fly with anyone else. She knows what she’s doing; her way of teaching is so effortless and flawless, it makes you understand clearly what you need to do.

And here’s a great example of how God puts you with people who will support your dream: I was chatting with Iona one day and I told her my plan – my big dream to fly aid into war-torn countries – and she was taken aback. ‘That’s what I wanted to do!’ she replied. ‘That’s exactly what I’ve wanted to do, but for whatever reason, I’ve never been able to achieve it.’ And then she floored me. She said: ‘You know, in a way, I’m achieving my dream through you. By getting you qualified and training you up in the most excellent way, I’m helping you to achieve your dream.’ I just think that’s amazing.

Ally grins

Serendipitous. What else do you want to do once you’ve got your ‘wings’?

I would love to fly seaplanes, island hopping, taking tourists around.

Sounds like an idyllic life. How long will this PPL take you?

It all depends. I have to get 45 hours in the air. Part of that is doing two solos, flying with an examiner, doing four touchdowns… The time I’ll take to achieve all this will depend on a number of factors: aeroplane and instructor availability, my availability, finances, my ability to study and pass nine extremely difficult ground exams…

I’ve given myself 24 months to complete my PPL because I’m taking the advice of some wise people who’ve gone before me, people who’ve achieved this dream. They say: take your time. Don’t rush it. Enjoy every moment. And that’s what I intend to do.

Have you completed any of the ground exams yet?

Yes, three of the nine. For the first two, I got 100%, and the third one: 87%, which I’m proud of. But I wouldn’t have been able to achieve any of this without the ground school I’m training with: Ash Holding, the PPL Groundschool owner, is an incredible trainer. He’s got 20+ years of experience, and I’m so grateful to him because I’m not a natural academic; I struggle with theory and the textbooks are thick. He’s a Godsend, just like Iona.

Once you’ve completed your PPL, what are your next steps?

I want to do an airline transport pilot licence (ATPL) – because only with an ATPL can I fly logistics, piloting various aircraft. I also want to get my Night Rating, so I can fly after sunset, and my Instrument Rating, so I can fly above the clouds and in low visibility.​

You’ve had quite a journey so far. You & your wife left South Africa – and everything and everyone you knew – in October 2001, and you came over to the UK and found yourselves at the bottom of the career ladder, right?

Yes, just before leaving SA, I was a full lieutenant in the navy, in the intelligence division – just six months away from being promoted to Lieutenant Commander. When I started over in London, I couldn’t get a job anywhere near my South African salary and had to start over as a security guard, on the night shift.

Why did you leave SA?

Apartheid. Or rather, a sort of reverse Apartheid. The ANC had taken over and they’d stopped all promotions of anyone not in the ANC. So they offered me a choice: leave, or remain in the navy at my current rank and go over to the Congo, where I would be in danger of contracting the Ebola virus, or die at the hand of a 12-year-old with an AK 47. So I left.

Both my wife and I had access to British passports, and we believed emigrating to England was our best option.

At that time, the internet was in its infancy in SA. Having never been to the UK before, and unable to ‘google’ as such, weren’t you fearful or worried about culture shock, or not having enough money, seeing as £1 would cost you about R11?

All of those things played on my mind, sure. But there was no future for me in South Africa. I was a 32-year-old white male. I believed there were better opportunities in England, and I’d contacted, via email, a few recruitment consultants in London who agreed with me. In their minds, I was an exciting candidate and they were sure they could place me in a fantastic job.

Zumbalicious
Zumbalicious

What went wrong? What were you hoping for in the UK and why didn’t it happen?

I was hoping to start as a manager, or senior manager, in the security industry – especially since this is what the recruitment consultants indicated I would be ideal for. But apparently I wasn’t skilled enough, according to the ‘powers that be’, and I had to start at the bottom: looking after construction sites at night for minimum wage. It was an extremely challenging time. I remember having to regularly wait outside in the snow at 4am, for a bus…

The first two years were the toughest. I was ready to pack up and go back to South Africa. The only thing that stopped me was that there was nothing to go back to. After that, it became slightly easier, but for the first five or six years in the UK, my wife and I were living hand to mouth. If we took a holiday, it was back to Cape Town, with one or two short-break exceptions – and we paid for every holiday with credit cards. We racked up a lot of debt. It took years for us to completely clear all the debt, but it taught us a valuable lesson: If we can’t pay cash for something now, we don’t get it. ​​

After starting out as a security guard, how did you manage to get to the point where you could afford to start training to be a pilot?

Over the years I proved myself in various jobs, and I was blessed in that I kept on getting headhunted. I moved from job to job in the UK, each time a little higher up the ladder and with a great leap in my salary, until 2016, when I was headhunted again, this time to go to the Middle East. I would be a senior contract manager, running a Ministry of Defence site just outside of Dubai, for a fantastic salary.

Without ever having visited the Middle East, my wife and I packed up our most precious things, and our two cats, gave almost everything else away – furniture, appliances, you name it – and rented out our house (which we’d bought in 2007). Then we got on a flight to Dubai.

We stayed in the Middle East for four years, until the contract ended and I was offered a job back in the UK. During those four years, we managed to get out of debt completely, and we also sold our house. I now had enough money to pursue my dream of flying.​

Ally and students
Ally and students
Ally and students

How does it feel to be pursuing your passion?

Amazing. There was a period of time after we returned from the Middle East where I had a few months off, between contracts. And it was great to not have to be concerned about finances during this time but just to enjoy my holiday – especially since I’d not had a proper long holiday for the four years we were in the Middle East.

I used this time to read/work through a book by Rick Warren: The Purpose Driven Life. For forty days, you read a chapter every day (you can also, optionally, listen to a daily online message, which I devoured). And the whole point/aim is to identify your purpose – the reason you’re alive right now, in this place, on earth.

Everybody’s created uniquely, with different skillsets, personalities, characters, experiences, passions/dreams, talents, gifts, and so on. You’re the only person at this time, in this place, able to do/be what God has planned for you to do/be – to make a difference in the world. This book helps you discover your purpose. It really does! It helps you realise what will get you out of bed in the morning, what drives you.

After the forty days, I realised that the thing that gets me out of bed in the morning – besides being a musician in a worship band – is flying. I decided from that moment on, I would pursue this dream, despite my age. It’s been life changing.

The fact that I’m earning a salary that pays for my dream is great. Because we’ve got no debt (we rent a house and lease a car), we’re not paying any interest on a credit card, and we owe nothing to nobody… so any additional money we have after paying our bills and buying groceries (and after giving to our church and to charities we support, as well as to the odd cause we stumble upon every now and then), goes towards my PPL.

My dream to be a pilot gets me out of bed at 4:15am every day during the week. It drives me to get to work early and to give excellence, because I know my job is paying for my dream. I want to go to work – because it pays for my dream.

Do you ever worry about the fact that you only have about 12 more years until you retire? Do you ever think that maybe you should be putting any extra money into investments instead of into an expensive dream? And isn’t there an age cap on being a pilot?

No. I mean, I’ve got a bit of money in investments, and I’ll continue to keep adding to that investment pot. But my priority is my pilot licence. I’m not interested in traditional retirement, i.e. sitting in a rocking chair in my old age. I want to fly until I can’t fly anymore. I intend to fly until I die. Thankfully, there’s no age limit. As long as I pass my medical every year, I can fly. If I don’t pursue my dream, I’m not really living.

It’s never too late to start pursuing your dream. And the bigger your dream, the better!

The Rick Warren book says that you are the sum total of your talents and gifts, your unique abilities, experiences, etc. – this makes you the only person who can fulfil the purpose God has for your life. Right?

Correct.

Ally and students

So what do you think is your Ultimate Purpose – your calling?

Flying for Jesus Christ. Flying aid into countries – and telling the world about His love, how much He cares for us, His promises for us…​​​

Ally and students

Photo by Seth Doyle on Unsplash

Is that your ultimate aim – your Big Dream?

Yes. I want to join a group of Christian pilots who transport food, medical supplies, Bibles, etc. into war-torn countries that the UN finds it difficult to get into.

Aren’t you worried about the danger?

When God’s got a purpose for you, that’s it. Everything just falls into place. And it’s only my time to ‘go’ when God says it’s my time.

To be a part of this Christian group, you’ll probably need your own aeroplane, right? How will you afford to buy one?

I have no idea. An aeroplane costs big bucks. But I do know this: When God calls you for something, He’ll equip you; He’ll make a way. If that’s your purpose, He’ll make it happen. And I’m excited to see how God’s going to make it happen. I have no doubt He will because my ultimate goal is to bring people to Jesus.

Why?

In Jesus, I have a Best Friend who helps me through every part of life, no matter how difficult it gets. And I want everyone to experience this amazing Love.

I’m not talking about a religion – following a set of rules. I come from a Catholic – very religious – background; it didn’t work for me. This is a totally different thing. It’s about having a relationship with God.

See, Jesus said He came to give us life – in abundance (John 10:10), and I can testify to that: that’s exactly what I have. Making a decision to follow Him was the best decision I have ever made. It’s a night-and-day difference in my life. And I want to share this free gift with everyone.

And there’s another thing: many people are of the mind that Christians should be poor. But that’s not what the Bible preaches. God tells us in His Word (the Bible) that He blesses us so that we can be a blessing to others (Genesis 12:2-3; Zechariah 8:18-23). I’m not rich, not in financial terms, anyway, but I am ‘comfortable’. If we were still financially poor, I would not be able to afford my pilot training. Then how would I fulfil the dream God has placed on my heart?

Ally and students

Also, there are many instances in the Bible where God makes it clear that He provides all our needs. We should lack nothing. He tells us we should be lenders, not borrowers. We shouldn’t be in debt. Etc. I can give you so many examples of how God has used my financial situation (which He has blessed me with) to bless others: charities we support, international churches we’ve financially assisted, an orphanage, a Bible school, helping homeless people and underprivileged families get on their feet…

Being a born-again Christian (or Follower of Christ) is awesome. I’m not ashamed to admit it. It’s changed my life.

I hear you.

Ally and students

Now, you have a lot of talents and interests, as well as a ton of experience in various industries… What made you choose aviation as your dream above everything? How do you know for sure that becoming a pilot is God’s will for you? Part of His plan?

So many reasons. I just know in my heart it’s what I should be doing. It gives me joy; it fulfils me; and it fits into His Big Dream of reaching out to a broken world – which is proof enough. But I’ll give you an example of one of the confirmations I received along the way.

When I started training, I went to a different flight school than the one I’m currently at. After I’d done my research, I’d decided to go to that flight school as it had very good reviews and it was close to home. And that’s where I met my instructor, Iona. If I had started my training just four months later, I would never have met her as she would have already moved on to the flight school she’s currently at (to which I followed her). And as I previously mentioned, the fact that she has the same dream as me with regard to flying aid into countries, that was enough for me.

And you know what? I don’t miss any of those other things as much as I thought I would. I still get to do most of them, things I enjoy; but they’re hobbies that make life fun. Flying is my passion and I’m willing to work harder at this than I was at any of my other talents. Also, I know that I’m part of a fraternity that not anybody can or wants to do. It’s not easy.​​

It’s scary, too, right? Are you afraid whenever you fly – especially since you’re still pretty new at it and still being trained?

If you’re not scared, then there’s something wrong.

So you feel the fear and do it anyway?

Yes, you have to. And it gives you that edge that you need. That heightened awareness. It’s a healthy fear. Healthy nerves. Because if you become over-confident, that’s where mistakes happen.

What are your top three natural abilities that enable you to be a good pilot, in your opinion?

I’m process-driven, and everything is a process when you’re a pilot. Processes you have to follow in every situation. And I believe in excellence. I go over and over things to make sure they’re correct.

I’m a multi-tasker, which is necessary for a pilot. You’ve got to be able to keep an eye on your surroundings, your controls, your route, etc., all while you’re operating the aircraft.

The ability to think quickly, and outside the box. In an emergency situation, this is vital. To be able to think of alternatives and choose the best one.

What would you say to someone who has always had a dream, but they’ve given up on it because they think they’re too old now – and yet they’re feeling unfulfilled? They’re doing a job that doesn’t make them happy; they feel they have no purpose…

It’s never too late. Age is only a number. And if you’re got that drive and that passion… Yes, you are going to hit brick walls and you are going to stumble. It won’t be easy. But if you have that drive, you can do it. Take it from me. Take it from all the people who – for whatever reason – only started pursuing their dreams later in life. If you have been given the passion, the dream, the purpose by God, there is nothing that can stop you.

If it’s a dream and a passion, follow it. Make the necessary changes. Find ways of making it happen. It will be worthwhile. Find a path. Even if that path takes you off course before you can get back on it again, use what you learn along the way. Decide that nothing will stop you, and just go for it. Because you’re always going to be unhappy if you’re not following your dream or fulfilling your purpose; you’re never going to feel fulfilled. And you end up in those dark places where you might not be able to get out of. There are so many stories of people who ended up depressed, committed suicide… At the same time, there are many stories of people hit by Covid who were let go from their jobs, or who gave up their jobs because they decided to follow their passion. Success might take a while to arrive, but the journey is a very fulfilling one.

I believe that the greatest thing that God has put in any human being is the drive to succeed for a purpose that’s been given to you.

Mark, thank you so much! What an inspiration you are. I truly believe you’ll achieve your dream.

Tweetable TAKEAWAYS:

It’s never too late to start pursuing your dream.

Pursue your passion; make a difference.

If you don’t pursue your dream, are you really LIVING?

Better an OOPS than a What If.

If God calls you, He’ll equip you.

Feel the fear and do it anyway!

Just so you know…

I don’t receive any reward or commission for promoting any of the people or businesses on my blog. I just want to inspire & motivate as many people as possible to fulfil their purpose & potential.

 If any other key points stood out for you, or you just want to let me know what you thought about this interview, feel free to comment below.

NEXT TIME on The Hopeaholic blog. . .

Inspiration, motivation, hope. You’ll find it all here.

If you subscribe to my monthly news blurb (it’s brief, honest!) you’ll be in the know. wink

Did you enjoy my blog? Please Share the Sunshine. 🙂

How To Live Full and Die Empty

How To Live Full and Die Empty

‘I came here because I want you to die…’

No, that’s not a line spoken by a James Bond villain. It’s the opening of a leadership talk by the late, great Dr Myles Munroe.

The moment he said those words, the audience’s nervous laughter rumbled around the auditorium. Dr Munroe smiled, then chuckled. Then his face took on an earnest look as he finished the sentence: ‘Empty… I want you to die empty.’

I had the privilege of meeting Dr Munroe, and hearing him speak, at a Leadership Conference many years ago. The best-selling author, transformational leader and teacher was passionate about people maximising their potential: living full & dying empty.

Before you read further…

YOU DON’T WANT TO MISS this 5-min. INSPIRATIONAL BITE:

WOW, right? I love how he starts with: ‘The wealthiest place on earth is not…’

And then, when he revealed the richest place on the planet – were you as astounded as I was?

How fired up are you right now? Every time I listen to one of Dr Munroe’s talks, or read his books, I am inspired, motivated and challenged to KEEP GOING – keep dreaming – and fulfil my potential.

Is that what you want?

I hope so. Because, if you’ve read my blog post on WORTH, you will know that:

No one else will ever be able to play your role on this earth in this lifetime.

You are the only one who can fulfil your purpose – a purpose as special, as unique, as you are. And you know what’s amazing? Once you start living on purpose, YOU will be fulfilled! You will wake up every day and JUMP out of bed, eager to get to work.

‘The greatest tragedy in life is not death, but a life without a purpose.’ Dr Myles Munroe

Are you bored with life? Depressed with your work situation? Lacking joie de vivre?

Time to change things up. Discover your purpose and I promise you, you will have a new lease on life.

And by the way…

As long as you’re still breathing, IT’S NEVER TOO LATE.

This is coming from a 50-year-old Dreamer who has yet to achieve her life goals. Then again, I am hooked on hope.

Because, you see, I know that…

It’s all about timing.

Some people can handle success at an early age. Many cannot.

What if you’re meant to grow first? What if you’re not ready for success just yet? Ever thought about that? There are countless stories of people who became successful – and weren’t ready for it. The result? They fell. Hard. And then the arduous uphill climb began. Or didn’t.

I can think of at least ten child actors for whom fame came way too soon. It nearly destroyed them. And that’s just an arbitrary example. There are so many people in various careers who’ve achieved success – and with it, wealth and fame – and they weren’t ready. (By the way, success doesn’t necessarily have anything to do with gaining money, power or fame.)

Some gave up entirely. They left home and started living on the streets. Others turned to crime. Others ended up in the wealthiest place on earth – and never, ever realised it.

Others dusted themselves off, swallowed their pride, and started again.

Then what happened?

They grew. And became successful again. This time, though, they were ready.

Still think you’re too old? That your time has passed?

Think again.

There are many stories about people who only achieved success later in life. But a lot of these stories, I’ve found, skew the truth. They neglect to mention that many of these people had some type of privilege – the right schools, money, contacts… All of which make a huge difference.

I’m not saying these people didn’t work hard to achieve their dreams, or that they didn’t deserve the fame. Not at all. They’re just not relatable to me.

Maybe you feel the same way? Maybe you, like me, prefer the stories about people who had none of those privileges. Because then…

Anything is possible.

Here are three of those stories…

 

Laura Ingalls Wilder was a wife, mother and teacher who longed to be an author. But she only began writing at 43.

Although she received rejection after rejection from publishers, she refused to quit. She kept on writing, improving her craft.

At age 65, she fulfilled her dream: Little House in the Big Woods was published. From that book came the best-selling ‘Little House’ series, followed by the successful TV series, Little House on the Prairie.

 

Kathryn Joosten had always wanted to be an actress; however, she became a nurse instead, to support her family.

And then her marriage ended. As a newly single, 42-year-old mother, she decided it was time to follow her bliss. She took on odd jobs and started out in community theatre. Many years of hard work, bit parts, ups and downs, disappointments, and a ton of rejections followed. Until she risked it all. She relocated to Hollywood – at the age of 56.

People called her crazy. She had no agent and no connections whatsoever. But she had a dream. And she also had the vivid memory of her mother dying with the angry regret of not having pursued her dream.

The gamble paid off. Within five months, Kathryn started acting regularly on TV shows. Success followed. At the age of 60, she got her big break. And at 65, she became a household name, having landed the recurring role of Mrs McCluskey in Desperate Housewives – for which she won two Emmy awards.

 

‘Grandma Moses’ was a farmer’s wife who spent decades selling homemade food to support her big family.

She was 58 when she started dabbling in painting; and her first materials were a piece of fireboard and leftover house paint. Art was merely a hobby she enjoyed in her spare time, until, at 67, she started devoting more time to her craft.

Her big break arrived when she was 78. An art collector saw Moses’s work in a local shop – and bought every piece. Success followed. This self-taught artist began exhibiting professionally, her paintings gained popularity, and she followed her bliss until her death at age 101.

Her paintings now sell for over $1 million.

 

I have to apologise. These three stories are female-biased. But there are many, many more out there. Just Google and you’ll see. Then again, keep reading. Men get their turn, too, later in this post.

These women were determined to fulfil their dreams. That’s what kept them going. They raised families and worked at ‘ordinary’ jobs. And they pursued their passion in their spare moments. They sacrificed time and luxuries. Because the pursuit of their bliss fulfilled them, filled them with joy, and gave them purpose.

They kept going until they had completed their work, refined their craft; until they had something to show. And then opportunity knocked. And they were ready.

Are you ready?

That collection of artwork – have you completed it?

That novel or that non-fiction book – have you finished writing it? Not just the first draft, but the polished, ready-for-publishing, proofread, brilliant final draft?

That invention that, once completed, is going to be a world-changer? That idea that popped into your mind one day and won’t leave? The answer to poverty; the cure for a disease; the solution to homelessness…

Keep working at it. Because what if opportunity surprises you one day by knocking on your door – or window – and you’re not ready?

Don’t NOT be ready.

‘There is a treasure within you that must come out. Don’t go to the grave with your treasure still within you.’ Dr Myles Munroe

Build it. Finish your work. Keep going, despite failures, disappointments, setbacks. Start emptying out that treasure inside of you. Then opportunity will come.

Now I know there will always be those who feel they have no special purpose. But I can assure you, that’s just not possible. If you’re feeling unfulfilled but you don’t have a burning desire to follow a particular dream, or you’re asking yourself how you can possibly fulfil your potential when you haven’t a clue what it could be… I urge you to read The Purpose Driven Life – Rick Warren’s bestseller. It’s a life changer.

And here’s something for you to think about…

It’s possible that your purpose isn’t clear to you yet – because the world isn’t ready for it.

In which case, I’d be pretty darn excited.

DID YOU KNOW…?

Photo by Ying Ge on Unsplash

All you need is one groundbreaking idea.

C.S. Lewis was 16 when, out of nowhere, a picture popped into his head: a faun carrying parcels and an umbrella in a snowy wood. He did nothing with it until decades later, when this image became the starting point for The Lion, the Witch and the Wardrobe – the first book in the wildly successful Chronicles of Narnia series.

J.K. Rowling’s lightbulb moment happened on a train. The picture of a young boy wizard just appeared in her mind. Like magic. And the Harry Potter series was born.

Dr James Watson won a Nobel Prize for his 1953 ‘discovery’: that the structure of DNA is a double helix spiral. This was a feat other scientists had found impossible. But the answer – an image of a spiral staircase – had come to Dr Watson in a dream.

Niels Bohr had a vivid dream in which he was sitting on the sun, watching the planets hiss around him on tiny cords. His gut instinct told him the image was the nucleus of the atom with electrons revolving around it in prescribed orbits. After dedicating his research to proving his theory, he won a Nobel Prize.

Jack Nicklaus, the six-time Masters champion, was experiencing a slump when he had a dream he was playing golf better than ever. On waking, he realised his dream self had gripped the golf club differently than he did in reality. Mimicking the dream grip vastly improved his golf swing, and he came back with a vengeance.

 

I hope those inspirational bites are as motivating to you as they are to me. As you work on discovering your purpose – so you can live full and die empty – may I suggest something?

Whatever circumstances you find yourself in, use them. Use whatever time you have to Dream, Plan, Visualise. And then figure out a way to make it happen.

A final thought…

EXPECT FAILURE.

Photo by Ying Ge on Unsplash

Actually, scratch that.

Embrace failure!

Because how will you know you’ve succeeded unless you’ve failed a few times?

Ask me, I know. I’ve failed over and over again. In a variety of ways. You can read about a few of them. Just click on any of the four links on my WORK page.

A lot of my failures are not that obvious. But the fact remains: I’ve been pursuing my dreams from an early age and I’ve not achieved them yet.

Do you find yourself in the same boat?

Be encouraged by this guy:

‘I have missed more than 9,000 shots in my career. I have lost almost 300 games. On 26 occasions I have been entrusted to take the game winning shot, and I missed. I have failed over and over and over again in my life. And that is why I succeed.Michael Jordan (aka ‘the greatest basketball player of all time’).

 

Go on. Grab life with both hands.

Live full…

So you can die empty.

With Love,

Vx

Tweetable TAKEAWAYS:

The wealthiest place on earth is the graveyard.

No one else will ever be able to play your role on this earth in this lifetime. 

‘The greatest tragedy in life is not death, but a life without a purpose.’ Dr Myles Munroe

Timing is Everything.

Anything is possible.

The only real regret is not having tried.

EMBRACE FAILURE.

If any other key points stood out for you, or you just want to let me know what you thought about this post, feel free to comment below.

NEXT TIME on The Hopeaholic blog: 

More uplifting content!

If you subscribe to my monthly news blurb (it’s free, and brief, honest!) you’ll be in the know. wink

Links to all my previous blog posts can be found on the main BLOG PAGE.

 

Did you enjoy my blog? Please Share the Sunshine. 🙂

Finding My Father — a true story

Finding My Father — a true story

I’m often asked why I’m so darn happy all the time.

I always find this funny because, well, I’m not. How can I be? I am human, after all. I experience deep emotional pain; I sob my heart out; I am no stranger to the lure of depression. However, I do have something…

An incomprehensible, inexplicable, deep-seated, everlasting JOY that never ever leaves me – no matter what life throws my way. (And it hasn’t all been Champagne and roses, I assure you.)

Here’s my story.

Up until the age of eight, I had the best childhood. Life was great, and both my parents were loving and caring. Then, out of the blue, they asked me, ‘Who do you want to live with?’

What a ridiculous question. Of course I replied: ‘I want to live with both of you.’

It was impossible for my young brain to comprehend that they were getting divorced. When they explained they would no longer be living together and then told me I’d have to choose with whom I wanted to stay, I cried my little heart out.

Eventually, I decided that because my dad had another daughter (from a previous marriage), but my mom didn’t have anyone except me, I would go and live with her. But it was a tough decision; I loved them both so much.

Within a year they were divorced. 

And my dad cut off all contact.

After a blissful childhood, where my mom and I had had more than enough, suddenly she was a single mother and I was a fatherless child.

The worst part was: my dad was still in touch with my stepsister. She not only received birthday and Christmas presents but she also got to spend holidays with him. I didn’t even get a phone call.

I couldn’t understand it. After much deliberation, I concluded it was because I’d done something wrong. Because I’d chosen my mother over him, maybe? But no one explained anything to me.

I was hurting. Of course I was. But I was not broken. Because something had happened a couple of years before that had prepared me for this.

Something that would impact the rest of my life.

I’ll come back to that.

My mom soon remarried. But her new husband was not a father to me.

The next seven years were emotionally and psychologically challenging. Our house never felt like a home.

Then: a revelation.

Just before I turned sixteen, my mom revealed that the man I’d called ‘dad’ was not my real father.

I’m pretty sure my jaw dropped to the floor.

Tears cascaded down my mom’s face as she told me she’d married my ‘dad’ when I was two years old, and he had adopted me. My real father was someone she’d loved very much when she was nineteen; and he’d moved away before she knew she was pregnant.

My mother was embarrassed and upset. She’d kept this from me for sixteen years and had no idea how I’d react.

Me? I was overjoyed! It was like finding treasure! First of all, the ‘dad’ who had abandoned me wasn’t even my father, so it didn’t really count. Secondly, I had a real dad out there somewhere who didn’t even know I existed. I was thrilled.

The last my mom had heard, my real dad was living in Johannesburg, South Africa. It was quite a while ago. No internet or mobile phones. Imagine! As we were living almost 1,000 miles away, in Cape Town, and we didn’t have a car – and public transport and flights were too expensive to consider – there wasn’t much I could do about this revelation at the time. However, I was content to wait.

I was nineteen when I finally met my biological father.

I’ll get back to that in a moment. Remember I mentioned that something happened a couple of years before my ‘dad’ and mom split up? It was – and always will be – the most significant event of my entire life.

When I was six, my aunt Margaret said to me, ever so casually, ‘Have you accepted Jesus as your Lord and Saviour?’

Just like that. Like she was asking what sandwich filling I’d like.

Now I have to clarify: my aunt was not wanting to know if I was interested in joining a religion. She was asking if I had a relationship. With God.

Bear with me… 

I knew about Jesus because I went to Sunday School. (I think my mom sent me every week so she could get some peace and quiet.) I knew Jesus was God’s Son, and that He loved me so much that He came to earth as a man to die for my sins; and then He rose from the dead and went back to Heaven. So saying yes to a relationship with God was an easy decision.

We knelt right there and then, on the floor, and she led me in a simple prayer, and I gave my life over to Jesus. And at that very moment, I became a child of God. He adopted me as His daughter and became my Heavenly Father. Best of all, He promised He would never, ever abandon me.

In His Word, the Bible, God says, The moment you accept My Son, Jesus, you become My child – no matter how old you are – and I’m your Father in Heaven. Forever.

Even though I didn’t have the greatest examples of dads, I had God as my ‘Papa’ from a very young age.

Without Him I would not be alive today.

That’s the honest truth.

God is amazing. His timing is always perfect. He knows every detail of our lives, from beginning to end. He knew the divorce was coming, so He ensured I had a perfect Heavenly Father to take the place of an imperfect earthly dad before I even realised I needed Him.

He knew that at the tender age of ten, my childhood would be stripped away. So He made sure I knew Him, so I could turn to my Papa God for comfort and healing.

I went through a lot of ‘stuff’, especially in my teenage years.

Several times I seriously considered suicide.

But God carried me through every single moment of my life – and He still does.

The past few years have been filled with challenging seasons; there have been many dark days. But God always gives me the strength to endure anything that comes my way.

See, He’s promised to work ALL THINGS – every detail of my life – into something good. And I believe Him.

And you know what else? He even gave me the love and forgiveness for the men who abandoned me, the men who let me down… And I mean total forgiveness. 

Do you have any idea how free I feel? It’s wonderful!

The most important thing is: I have peace.

Peace that surpasses all understanding.

Throughout my life, God has been there as my Heavenly Father. Whatever He’s allowed me to go through has only served to make me stronger. So when I found out that my real dad was out there somewhere, I was OK to wait on God’s perfect timing.

Almost four years later…

I was nineteen and had just arrived in Johannesburg to be a missionary with a performance group. So, I picked up a telephone directory (no Google, remember?) and looked up the name my mom had given me. And there it was; the only one. It had to be him.

Feverishly I wrote a four-page letter: my life in a nutshell. I ended it by saying that I didn’t want to mess up his life. I knew nothing about him. For all I knew he had a family of his own, and I could just imagine how life-wrecking a nineteen year old turning up on your doorstep and claiming she’s your daughter could be. So I said I just wanted to see him, to meet him once. And then he could go on with his life. I was OK with that. I told him that I didn’t harbour any ill toward him; I understood that he didn’t know I existed.

Three days after I posted the letter, I received a phone call.

I will never forget that call. His voice was like honey. He was in shock. The conversation started with him saying, ‘But I don’t have a daughter.’ And at the end of the conversation he stated, ‘I have a daughter!’

It was a magical, unforgettable moment.

We arranged to meet, and he brought his wife and their two little boys. It felt surreal. We stood staring at each other for a long time.

Meanwhile, my heart was beating like it was trying to escape.

His wife was the first to speak. All she said, with no doubt in her voice, and a serene smile, was: ‘This is your daughter.’

I cannot tell you how overjoyed I was.

And guess what?

The timing of all of this was perfect!

Firstly, the letter arrived on the last day the postman would deliver to my dad’s street. From the day after, it would be post boxes only. And as no other address had been listed in the directory, if I had mailed my letter even one day later, I can’t say it would have got to him.

Secondly, my dad and his wife had just come through a rough patch. If that letter had arrived any earlier, they weren’t sure their relationship would have been strong enough to handle it.

When my dad explained all this to me, I smiled. God is amazing. He never comes too early or too late.

And the best was yet to come.

No earthly dad is ever going to be perfect, but I can’t imagine a more fabulous human dad than mine. He is amazing. And his wife is so much more than I could ever have hoped for: my best friend, older sister, mother, spiritual counsellor, all rolled into one. She’s beautiful, inside and out, and the relationship I have with them is incredible.

So that’s why I’m so darn ‘happy’ all the time. Because…

I am grateful.

I have been blessed, blessed, blessed by God. And I don’t deserve any of it.

My Heavenly Father, out of no motivation except pure love, looks after me, looks out for me, and brings me back to Him whenever I stray off the path. He is unfathomably compassionate and kind and the most perfect ‘Dad’ ever.

The reason I’ve shared this? I just want you to know: Whoever you are, whatever you’ve done – you are loved by the Creator of the universe. He loves you so much, He sent His only Son, Jesus, a perfect man, to die a horrific, undeserved death – so that you can have a FULL life; life in abundance!

I promise you – no matter what your circumstances are – if you hand the reins of your life over to Jesus, He will turn things around for you. I’m talking:

A night-and-day difference.

No matter what you are going through, what you’ve been through, what’s ahead – you have a sure way to endure it all and to come out the other end stronger than before. Ask me, I know.

Surrendering your life to Jesus Christ is the best decision you will ever make. I’ve never regretted it.

As if that’s not enough, when your short time on earth comes to an end, if Jesus is your Lord & Saviour, you are assured of Eternal Life in Heaven. This is God’s free gift. You just have to take it.

As Paul the apostle says in one of his letters: ‘These hard times are small potatoes compared to the coming good times, the lavish celebration prepared for us.’ (2 Corinthians 4:17, The Message translation of the Bible)

So now you know why I’m so darn ‘happy’ all the time:

I’m a prisoner of hope.

A hope-aholic.

And there’s no reason you can’t be too.

This song pretty much sums it all up.

With Love,

Vx

P.S. If you have trouble thinking of God as a Good, Loving Father, I highly recommend The Shack (movie or book — they’re both amazing). Watch the trailer.

Have you made a decision to follow Jesus? I would love to hear about your journey! Share your story or a part of it in the comments section, below.

If you want to know more, please do get in touch. I’d love to introduce you to my Best Friend.

Tweetable TAKEAWAYS:

‘In ALL things God works for the GOOD of those who love Him.’ Romans 8:28

God’s timing is perfect.

God’s love is UNCONDITIONAL.

Jesus is the Way, the Truth, the Life.

#livinglifetothefullest

‘”For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the Lord. “Plans to prosper you and not to harm you; to give you a hope and a future.”‘ Jeremiah 29:11

God is the only One who will never let you down.

If any other key points stood out for you, or you just want to let me know what you thought about this post, feel free to comment below.

NEXT TIME on The Hopeaholic blog: 

More uplifting content!

If you subscribe to my monthly news blurb (it’s free, and brief, honest!) you’ll be in the know. wink

Links to all my PREVIOUS BLOG POSTS can be found on the BLOG PAGE.

 

Did you enjoy my blog? Please Share the Sunshine. 🙂